Posted by Bill-Johnson on 04/30/09

Once upon a time, the squirrels had plenty of acorns. This was before credit cards and government bonds were discovered, which are the same thing.

These industrious little squirrels gathered more acorns than they could use and they stashed the extra acorns for the future. Hence the phrase, "squirreled away."

The acorns they buried, like savings, grew into mighty oak trees which in turn produced more acorns which was good for the squirrel economy. Life was good for the squirrels because they would wake up, eat a few acorns, bury a few acorns and frolic for the rest of the day.

Then one day a few well-intentioned governmentally minded squirrels sold the common squirrels on the idea of free acorns. No longer would they have to bury acorns for the future since the leaders would negotiate with the squirrels on the other side of the stream for a supply of acorns.

As the governmentally minded squirrels borrowed more and more acorns, the arrangements became more complicated and the common squirrels grew concerned about the new acorn taxes. Instead of buying acorns themselves, they were to give their money to the well-intentioned governmentally minded squirrels who in turn would give them their money back to buy acorns, like a rebate. The little squirrels worked more, had fewer acorns and in the end began to feel like slaves.

As time went on the common squirrels were beginning to realize that they didn't need the well-intentioned governmentally minded squirrels.

Back then, the governmental squirrels didn't have a Federal Reserve printing press to print more acorns, so they came up with a new plan. To preserve their political offices and to keep the common squirrels dependent on the system, the governmental squirrels conspired and deceived the cows.

They promised nice warm stalls for the cows and all the free grain they could eat. "You deserve more," the cows were told.

Once they were secure in dimly lit stalls, they were hooked to milking machines and given production standards. They would have to pay a tax with milk for all of the free benefits. They even had to pay a milk-tax to buy the milking machines, but they were told this was for their benefit, not the government's benefit. The cows began to feel like slaves too.

When the fat governmental squirrels couldn't provide enough acorns for the hungry squirrels they began a Balance Diet program that included Free Government Cheese at the cow's expense. To get your free cheese you had to work in the cheese factory and pay your acorn taxes.

Before you knew it, the squirrels evolved into hamsters and ran on exercise wheels to pay their taxes for free cheese and cages. The masses were enslaved. No longer did they wake, eat a few acorns, bury a few acorns and frolic the rest of the day.

The moral of the story is; for a free acorn, they became slaves because there is no such thing as a free lunch.

Around the same time, Rome was in decline and a Roman Senator suggested that all slaves wear white armbands to better identify them. "No," said a wiser Senator, "If they see how many of them there are, they may revolt."

Eventually we will realize that the property and income taxes we pay result from the Free Acorns we wanted.

Bill Johnson, (C) 2008

Posted 04/30/09 Matt Anderson Mora, MN

Or the Acorns that past generations wanted.

Posted 04/30/09 Matt Anderson Mora, MN

Funny thing is I just torn apart an old shed and underneath was a chipmunk and thousands of acorns store away. The chipmunk climbed a tree when his stash hidden place was shown. It all ended for the chipmunk when he fell out of the tree and my dog caught him mid air.